It has been an emotional time in the Morris household this past month. There is a commercial that says "Life comes at you fast" - and it feels like life has thrown a cannon ball at me.
All I can say is that I hope the rest of this year is much calmer. I had a sure-ness about life that isn't there right now, but I hope I feel it again soon.
My water broke this morning. Continue reading if you want.
Last Tuesday was devastating but we were handling it well. I took the rest of the week off of work, and just spent time with Ava. We did a little shopping and it was nice. I had made an appointment with my OBGYN for tomorrow to discuss the D&C procedure, since I was sure that's what I wanted to do. I took a pregnancy test on Friday and it was still positive.
Last night I noticed a little discharge, something like I would get right before a period. It wasn't very noticeable, but it made me tense up. I had no cramping or anything, and it quickly went away. Then this morning I was woken up at 7:30 thinking I just wet the bed. There was a lot of fluid. It was completely surreal. I jumped up and ran to the bathroom, still thinking I had peed, but then I saw the blood. I realized then that my water broke while I was sleeping. After calling the midwife on call, it was decided that I should go to the emergency room just to get checked out. We spent hours there. Obviously, I was in the process of expelling everything, and it was going smoothly. They did an ultrasound to make sure, and also took a tissue sample to run some routine tests.
Apparently what I had was a missed miscarriage. Now that this occurred, it is a complete miscarriage. I am actually relieved that this happened, because now we can move on. I have not had any pain, and the bleeding has subsided quite a bit. We can start trying again in a couple of months.
I have a few friends & family members who have personally experienced this, and it has been a huge comfort to me that they have shared their stories and advice with me. I have felt such a wide range of emotions in the past few days, but I never felt alone. I have read the blogs of strangers - friends of friends - who have experienced such heartbreak in this area recently, and I am thankful that they shared what they went through. Which is why I wanted to share mine - you never know who might stumble across it.
